


Can I Get An Amen?

by oli_vore



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Avengers Feels, Avengers Tower, Hydra (Marvel), I Don't Even Know, Loki (Marvel) is a Good Bro, Marvel Universe, Multi, One Big Happy Family, Superpowers, Tony Stark Does What He Wants
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-23
Updated: 2018-05-01
Packaged: 2019-04-06 19:07:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 7
Words: 10,724
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14063517
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oli_vore/pseuds/oli_vore
Summary: Bucky doesn't want to be in this situation. Hell, he can hardly even explain what the situation is. In all honesty, he kinda wants to go home. The so-called "king" of this place calls himself Loki, and so far Bucky's been here for a day and already he'd rather be back at the Hydra base.





	1. Chapter 1

Listen, when Bucky thought he’d be running from Hydra he didn’t think he’d be running from Hydra. Ever since escaping the base he was held at, he’d been recovering. Remembering who you are turns out to be harder than you’d think. As Bucky weaved his way through the thick trees of the forest, the ground his feet were slapping against became smoother. The roots and rocks started to dissipate as he reached closer to what seemed like an open area in the forest. His breathing was too labored and his eyes couldn’t focus properly. Where had he gone wrong? How had they found him? Luckily for Bucky, he appeared to have stumbled upon a building of some sort. Now, It’s probably not the smartest idea to hide in an obvious place when you’re on the run, but dear lord Bucky did not want to run anymore. Bucky considered knocking on the worn door, however, did he really expect anyone to answer? I mean this place looks as if it’s been abandoned for decades! The door creaked open with only a light push from Buck. It was completely black inside. What else should he have suspected to be inside? Bucky’s adrenaline-filled brain pushed him to believe this was his best option. He crept in, snaking his way in between the door and the doorframe. Sitting in the dark, Bucky couldn't help but think he should've brought a source of light. He turned around to exit the building in hopes of finding something to help him see. However, the door slammed in his face as soon as he reached the handle. He really needs to learn to be more cautious, because suddenly, a clothed had found its way over his nose and mouth. Before Bucky had time to yell he had passed out in the arms of a stranger.


	2. The beginning of something new

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aw heck, some shit goes down. Also, I'd like to clarify I'm not into vore the tiniest bit lmao it's just for the meme.

Bucky’s eyes snapped open and he sat up with a gasp for air. He began to feel nauseous as he felt someone push him back down in bed. “Don’t kill yourself already. It’s only your first day here, pal.” He chuckled as he sat down next to Buck on the bed.  
“What happened?” Bucky asked as he looked around and tried to figure out where he was. It looked like a bed and breakfast but not at all. He noticed his clothes were laid over a metal chair in the room. There was a portrait of a man with sleek black hair on the wall opposite from him. However, Bucky then realized he didn’t need an answer because oh my god he fucking remembered.

Bucky remembered. Which wouldn’t be a strange thing to most, but this is bucky. He couldn’t remember his life before Hydra one bit, but somehow here he was, remembering last night with ease.  
“You passed out after getting drugged, so I don’t blame you for that. The only problem is, we have no clue who you are, and only criminals and druggies come running through the woods at night. So what did you do?”  
Bucky felt like a toddler being scolded for doodling on the walls. The mere presence of the man towering over him sent shivers down his spine. He could only imagine what kind of horrible people lived in this run down hell hole. 

“Listen, sir, I haven’t committed a crime in my life I swear. Really, I was trying to run away from these guys. Ah, not like a gang or anything.” Bucky stuttered. “Listen if you’ll just let me explain this whole situation to your “king”, I can clear things up and, you know, leave you all alone out here in the woods. I won’t say a thing about this to anyone, promise.”  
“Our king is a power-driven super villain that can do more damage than any of us. He’s cunning and cruel, and he doesn’t care about anything but himself. Still wanna talk?”  
“Well, why would you keep a crazy supervillain in your home?” Bucky asked like it was the dumbest question. Because obviously, you don’t keep villains in your homes, right?  
“He’s a good leader, he’s just pretty emotionally unstable. He’s scared and frustrated and hasn’t trusted people ever since his father abandoned him. Loki is..he’s a really complex guy.”

The man sighed. “All I’m saying man, is that you don’t need to be afraid. You’re safe here, really.”  
“I’d be safer if I could leave.” he mumbled under his breath. The man chuckled.  
“You’d rather be running from that gang-not-gang than being here with us? I’ll let the others know you’re awake. We should be able to take you to get some food. You’re always welcome to visit me if you want. This here is my room.” He gestured to the space around him.  
It was quiet and awkward for a while until there was a knock at the door. Well, it was kind of a thud. Then there was a yell.  
“STARK! JOIN US AT THE DINING TABLE AND PLAY THE GAME OF CAN YOU LIFT THE MIGHTY THOR’S HAMMER?”  
The man, Stark, sighed and opened the door to a beaming blonde brute.

“Thor, you don’t need to yell. Plus, we have guests.” Stark Gestured to Bucky. “Come on, Let’s get you some food and then I’ll introduce you to some people.”  
They left the room and came to a table with Two people already sitting at it. Three, as soon as the Thor guy sat down. “They’re all nice, don’t worry.” Stark encouraged.  
“Hey, Tony. Hey, I know I saw you briefly yesterday, but I didn’t get the chance to introduce myself. I’m Steve Rogers.” he grinned and stared at him like he was waiting for him to reply. Bucky looked down at his shirt, which he still didn’t know who it belonged to. “What?”  
“Oh. Yeah. I'm, uh, Bucky.”Steve grinned and nodded politely. Stark came back then with a plate of food. Eggs and lettuce with bread. Bucky didn’t care. It’s still better than anything he got back in the Hydra base. “Ah, thanks” He mumbled.

Bucky ate a little before someone was poking him. “Hey, I’m Bruce.” Bucky nodded his head at the scruffy looking man while he continued to chew his eggs.  
Bucky decided he liked Steve and Bruce. He didn’t know about Thor quite yet. He’s loud.  
Minutes later, Tony was pulling Bucky out of his chair, nearly giving him a heart attack. “I just want to introduce you to someone. She’s cool I swear.” He started down a hallway to a recreational area where they sat down across from a woman with smooth brown hair. “Bucky, this is Wanda.” Tony introduced them and the girl, Wanda, smiled softly at Bucky. She proceeded to fiddle with her hands. 

Hmm. Shy like Bucky.

“Thanks for leaving the door unlocked,” Tony chuckled. Wanda looked offended.  
“You’re not seriously still mad about that, right? I mean if you didn’t like him he’d be dead!” She retorted.  
Bucky couldn’t tell if she was joking or not. “Ah, sorry for getting you in trouble, Wanda.”

“Ok,” Tony started as he stood up. “Thanks for the riveting conversation, but I think we’ll be taking our leave now.”  
“It was nice to meet you Bucky!” Wanda bleated and waved goodbye as Tony pulled Bucky away again back to the table from before.  
“Hey ‘Tash!” Tonys chipper tone interrupted Bucky’s thoughts as he was shoved down at a table with Thor, Bruce, Steve, and now this new redhead. “This is Bucky, Banner knocked him out last night.” Tony explained, waving his hands all over the place. 

“So he’s your pet?” ‘Tash said with a smirk. Bucky could feel his face turning red.  
“Do not under any circumstances piss Natasha off,” Tony said with a jab of his thumb. “She will fuck you up.”

“I’m usually a decent person. Or at least I like to think so.” Natasha joked.  
Bucky mentally noted to not mess with anyone at this table. Oh God, he thought, they’re going to kill me.  
“Bucky?” Steve reached out to touch him again. Bucky flinched and pulled away. “What’s wrong?”  
“Why are you being so nice to me?” Bucky’s voice was breaking more every second that passed. This place was so different yet oh so similar to the Hydra base. “You’re gonna hurt me and eat my flesh to survive or something or-”

“Bucky, we won’t hurt you. We’re the good guys here, okay?” Steve explained, placing a comforting hand on Bucky’s shoulder.  
“Then let me leave,” Bucky suggested. His tongue felt fat in his mouth and there was a lump in his throat. He just wanted to go back to his bed, and fast food, and clean clothes, and, oh god a shower sounded nice.

Tony sighed, “You - you can’t leave Bucky. I’m sorry, I really am, but you can’t.”  
“You can’t just keep me here!” Bucky wouldn’t cry. He wouldn’t. Little kids cried and Bucky was a grown man. “I have a life out there! I have a life -” That was kind of an untrue statement, so his argument was pretty weak, but they didn’t have to know that.  
“I know, and I’m so sorry Wanda didn’t watch the door and you came in and Banner got so scared he knocked you out. I’m so, so sorry, but you know where we are, and we can’t let you leave. It would expose us to Hydra, and we can’t risk an attack on the only safe space we’ve had in years.” Steve sighed, the dirty blonde wrapping his arms around him tightly. This was awful.

“Life here isn’t that bad. We’ll find you a room, everyone here is nice, I promise. It’s a fresh start.” The curly haired Banner spoke up.  
“You can rest in my room if you want, take a shower, brush your teeth. You can borrow some clothes too. Well, you are right now but, ah, we can share.” Steve said. Oh, So it was Steve’s pajamas he was wearing.

Bucky was being shuffled into a dark room with a bed, a nice bed. Bucky took his shirt off and climbed under the scratchy blankets. Banner was telling him where things were, but Bucky wasn’t listening. He was already starting to fall asleep quickly. 

It’s been a stressful day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks again for reading! It means a lot to me. My name's Oliver by the by. Feedback is always appreciated! Things are about to get spooky babes.


	3. Can't You Two Just Be Friends?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki meets Bucky and o h

Bucky found himself trapped in a room.

Where was he?

Someone stepped out of the shadows. It was the man from the portrait with green eyes and slick black hair. He was chuckling, evil and bitter, and suddenly the man started to tear at his own skin. He tore open flesh, revealing pearly white bone. With a bloodied hand he reached in his mouth and tore his tongue straight from his mouth without flinching. The man dropped his tongue and dug his fingers into the sockets of his eyes, pulling out the green orbs with ease. "If only it were as simple as telling myself to stop. To tell myself that you could never be mine. Though, in a way you already are mine. I have you now and I can’t stop thinking about tearing you apart." The man's voice is oddly chipper, his accent only makes it creepier.

"You'd like it, wouldn’t you?" Dropping his eyes carelessly, the grotesque man stumbled forward grasping onto Bucky's face. He peered down at him as the flowing blood filled his mouth and started to drown him.

Bucky woke up covered in sweat. He felt like vomiting. It was just a dream, he told himself, just a dream. Except that it wasn’t because that very psychopath from his dream was living in this building.

After slipping one on of Steve’s T-shirts, he pulled open the door and started his search for some coffee and breakfast.Bucky didn’t really know where he was going. When he arrived in the dining area he got a few strange looks. They are probably wondering why the “pet” was roaming the halls by himself. 

They seem to have been having a meeting of some sort before a familiar man in green stormed out of the room. A few moments later a door slammed down one of the hallways. Oh. This is new. Bucky stood in the doorframe of the dining hall. There was an awkward tension hanging in the air that almost felt palpable.   
They told me he was a megalomaniac narcissist but he has the stability of an emo teenager too?

“Look who’s awake!” Natasha clapped as Steve finished folding up some papers. “You look a lot better. How did you sleep?”  
Bucky lost his train of thought mid-sentence as he heard an angry yell from the hallway the green man disappeared into. What a way to start the day.   
“This is exactly what I’m talking about!” The green man shouted as he drags a disheveled and homeless looking man by his coat behind him. 

Woah okay, this guy has a spear now.

The green man swiftly plunges the spear into the homeless man's gut while explaining something about killing intruders or something. This time Bucky did vomit. Which was kind of unfortunate because now the green man was staring at him.  
The green man looked speechless. 

Steve had stepped in front of Bucky in order to explain.  
“Listen, Loki, there’s good reasoning for him being here I swear.” Steve stressed the fact that Bucky was special, but it didn’t seem like the Loki guy was having it. “His arm.”  
Bucky often wondered why his arm was so weird. I mean, other people have prosthetics too. His fingers clenched in annoyance. It’s not like he wanted the damn thing.

“Why did you come here?” Loki demanded. Tony opened his mouth to speak, but Bucky beat him to it.

“I was running from someone,” he began, He didn’t want to show Loki how intimidated he was. “and I was curious.”

Loki’s mouth drew to a thin line. “It’s not nice to invade.” 

“Sir?” Tony injected, causing Loki to shoot daggers his way. “Don’t you remember Steve’s friend? It’s possible that Bucky is, er-” Loki rolled his eyes.

“If this is James, why would he not recognize Steven?” He sounded bored. 

“Steve.” Steve insisted, placing a reassuring hand on Bucky's shoulder. Loki sat down, resting his head in one of his hands.

“The trauma, remember?” Tony said carefully.

Steven? Do you recognize this man?” Loki almost sounded friendly. 

“Well, er, kinda, but James had short hair and he was cleanly shaven. Just give me some time to clean him up a bit, okay?” One solid minute of waiting and Loki finally responded. Bucky was trying to look anywhere but at Loki.

“Fine,” Loki looked forward. “But if you fail to recognize him before the end of tonight he shall be slain.” The way Loki was sizing up Bucky really made him question what exactly he was planning for him. Steve pulled Bucky away down the hall, leading Bucky into a bathroom. The dirty blonde reached into a drawer and pulled out a razor and scissors. 

Oh no.

Steve grabbed Bucky by the shoulder tightly and proceeded to cut off large chunks of his precious hair. Bucky placed a hand on his head and, oh, that’s different. Once his hair was shortened to Steve's liking, they started to shave. It was pretty uncomfortable to have Steve’s massive arms trying to find a good angle around his face. Steve cut Bucky’s face multiple times and Bucky questioned if this kid has ever shaven. Steve, with watering eyes, held up a small mirror for bucky. Steve took out his makeshift wallet and held up an old looking picture of what only appeared to be Bucky.

James.

Steve wrapped his arms around Bucky’s shoulders. Bucky had his arms wrapped around himself. He felt like a different person. There was an overwhelming amount of information flooding back into his mind, but Bucky wanted to remember it all.

“I remember the bridge, Steve. I remember who I was.” Now Bucky was tearing up too. “There are huge gaps where I don’t remember anything, but I, I remember you.”

And it wasn’t even noon yet.


	4. Are You Flirting With Me?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Loki is emo and flirts a little because honestly he is such a moody guy

Bucky remembered long nights with Steve before the war. Steve had changed so much, but so had Bucky. Bucky didn't think Steve would want go back to their old ways anytime soon, if even ever at all.   
Steve was already ashamed back when they were in a complicated relationship together. Surely times have changed since then, because y'know, Steve wasn't much of a twink anymore.

By now Steve had already run to tell everyone that Bucky was his Bucky, but Bucky was still stuck in the bathroom remembering it all.   
There was so much he'd missed. 

Steve Rogers. 

He remembered when they wanted to get married, but that time has passed now.

Back in the dining hall, Steve was searching for their leader.

"Where's Loki? He needs to see this." Steve questioned Thor. 

"He should be in his personal chambers, but if he's not I'd rather you just wait for him until he returns." Thor replied.

If Loki was not in his room, where would he be? It wouldn't be surprising to find out that Loki disappeared throughout the day, but no one knew where he went.  
He's probably off sacrificing virgins or something.

Steve must have really bad luck ,because speak of the devil. 

As Loki entered the room he looked pissed. Steve was half expecting Thor to be angry too, but nothing could mask the distinct concern in the blonde god's face.

“Where’s your friend? We need to have a word.” Loki said while glaring at Steve.”He’ll have to explain why whilst I was on my walk I spotted a Hydra agent behind a tree with a gun.”

“Listen, Loki I'm sure he really didn’t mean to. It’s James, He’s-” Loki interrupted Steve before he could even finish his thought.

“He could have exposed us for all we know!” Loki argued. Thor took in Loki’s appearance, looking ashamed as the realization hit him.

“Steven, there was no Hydra agent. Do not worry.” Thor said solemnly as he swiftly grabbed Loki’s arm and yanking up his sleeve to reveal small pinkish dots lining the crook of his elbow. “He’s been using again.”

“Are you serious? I don’t understand why we can’t even trust our own leader!” Steve shouted.

“Uh, hey, Steve I wanted to talk to you.” Bucky awkwardly waddled into the room looking for Steve when he came face to face with three angry men. Well, Loki looked angry for a while but as he and Bucky made eye contact, a sly smirk grew onto his face. 

“So, this is the little boy you’ve brought for me? I know I'm a great fucking king but do i really deserve this hot piece of-”

“Loki!” Steve yelled, interrupting him.

“Steve, I’m sorry he tends to get moody and disrespectful when he’s high.” Thor explained while glaring at his brother. To say this was disappointing would be an underwhelming truth. Thor’s statement seemed to only push him further.

“Come on Bucky, we’re gonna have to wait until he’s sober. In the meantime you can help me clean out his room of any PCP or needles.” Steve said as he lead Bucky through the door to Loki’s room. He glared at Loki before shutting it in his face.

"You aren’t going to let me play with your pet?” He called out loudly from behind the door. “I already called dibs. I’m the one who gets to fuck him and cut up his skin!" Bucky thought he was going to faint right then and there. The other two men chose to ignore the comment, so buck guessed this was his normal behavior. Bucky could feel his face heat up. ` 

“Loki,” Thor warned, his voice firmer than Bucky had ever heard. “You need to go rest. Leave them alone.” Loki’s mood changed immediately, and he slumped into Thor’s arms with a sob. He swallowed his pride in large gulps, trying to fill his empty lungs.

“Come, brother. Let’s go to my chambers.”Thor cood, his voice soft and supportive. Steve sighed behind the door. Bucky was worried for Loki.

“Go check in his closet for anything suspicious.We can’t have a druggie leader. I really love Loki as a leader, but it’s hard to respect a guy who's too weak to fight his own reality.”Steve’s voice tapered off at the end, like he wasn’t certain he meant that last part.

Bucky realized now how much Steve really had changed. He shuffled over to Loki’s closet as he thought of the old Steve and how he would see the good in everyone and take into account their reasons for their actions. Maybe they never really could get back together.“I’m sure he has a reason Steve, don’t judge him without knowing his side. This isn’t your fault, but you should at least feel bad for the guy.”

Bucky wasn’t sure Steve heard him as he pulled an orange shoebox out of one of the dresser drawers.

“God! There’s nothing in here. Great, now we have to figure out where he’s going to shoot up.” Steve said as he rustled through various multi-colored socks. 

-

Natasha sighed as she inspected her nails. She looked extremely bored with the conversation. “Well sure Mr. Giggles and nice hair can manipulate people and reality and all that jazz, but he can’t do this!” and then Tony was watching in shock as ‘Tash somehow began to convince the Hulk to return to Mr. Banner. She said her line, the sun’s getting real low, and Banner started to regain control. Tony beamed. Natasha is the seventh wonder of this world.

While Bruce was climbing off of the muddy ground of the forest, Tony reached out a hand to help him up. Turns out Tonys not so strong without a suit. Bruce pulled him down into the mud while he jumped up to his feet.

“Fuck you, Bruce,” Tony mumbled as he wiped the mud from his forehead with the back of his hand.He then ran his fingers through his now dirty hair. “Now I have to go fix my hair. This took me forever to make perfect, you know!.” Tony pouted. Bruce rolled his eyes.

“Let’s Go back inside and get you a shower. Don’t come out until you’re spotless because I don’t want to see you otherwise.” Natasha’s voice teased as she pushed Tony towards the large brick building they called home.

“Wow Natasha, that took longer than usual, losing your touch eh?” Steve joked as the troupe entered the recreational hall.

“Shut up. Where’s Buck?” 

“Showering. We just ate, so help yourself to leftovers.” Steve replied with a small smile. He was debating telling the rest of the team about Loki’s actions, but he was so exhausted.

He'll tell them tonight.

By the time Bucky got out of the shower, he was expecting to be sleeping for days. Except Bucky was awake and it was 4:26 am. He doesn’t want to have another nightmare.  
“Why won't you just pass out?” Bucky asked himself as he rubbed his eyes.

“I wouldn’t want to miss a second of this. Too much stress coursing through your body It’s almost funny.” An accented voice said from the dark of Bucky’s room.

“Oh my-Listen, I wasn’t talking to you I was just-” Bucky’s heart felt like it might just pop.

“Talking to yourself. I get it. I can help you if you want.” Bucky suspected it was Loki before he flicked on a light.

“I don’t know about that,” Bucky replied. “I’m just so afraid. Everyone here is stronger than me and I can never know who might be digging around in my head.” Loki pushed his back against the wall as he raised an eyebrow in suspicion.

“What makes you think we’d do that to you?”

“Curiosity maybe. I don’t know.”Bucky lamely replied.

Loki scowled. “If I were you I would start trusting the people here. I certainly think they’re more inclined to protect rather than attack if you’re trusting and honest about something like this.”

“What do you mean ‘something like this’?”

“Emotions often appear before we realize we’re feeling them. It is not your fault you can’t help but fear me.” Loki’s face went dark. “But you should be careful.You know as much as I do things just aren’t as fun the easy way. Don’t try to meddle in someone's life when you know you aren’t going to be happy with the results.”

“What do you mean? I’m not trying to get involved in anyone's lives.” Bucky muttered the last part under his breath.

“You’re not foolish and either am I. We both know how this will go. You are going to attempt to be my friend and fix me, and all I ask is that you don’t. Everyone in the building is now fully aware of what happened earlier because Steven won’t shut his mouth. I lowered my guard and risked everything just for a fucking high.” The beginning of a smirk rose to Loki’s lips. “I can certainly tell you care for Steve.Hm.” 

Bucky could be wrong but was that a hint of jealousy he heard? He lowered his head and his face turned bright red. “That’s personal.”

“My apologies. I won’t ask again,” He pushed away from the wall with a sigh. “But if you ever need some company I’m, uh, I’m always available. I assume you aren’t going to sleep anytime soon?” Loki asked.

“I’m actually getting pretty sleepy, so could try I guess.” Bucky replied.

“Great, great. I’m gonna take a shower. Ah, try and get enough sleep ok? Your poor body needs it.”  
Bucky nodded his head. 

“Loki?” Bucky called out before the lanky man could leave. 

“Yes, James?” Loki swiveled back around.

“Thank you for this. Really, it means a lot.” Loki nodded his head.

“Anything you need, just say the word.”

“Wait, one more thing,” Bucky started. He hated how needy he sounded, but at the moment he had a million questions. “Are you gonna stop using the drugs?”

“I’m going to try.” Loki said with a sad smirk. He looked down at his feet shamefully and shuffled his feel on the little board of the door frame that separated Bucky’s floor and the hallway.

“Thank you.” Bucky mumbled as he snuggled himself deeper into the pillows. He pulled the blankets over his shoulders and sighed.

There was a shuffle of footsteps and Loki’s lips were suddenly gently pressed to Bucky’s forehead.

“Sleep well, James.”


	5. Oh, So Tony Is A Nice Guy Huh?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky and a special bird boy have history. Tony takes Buck out and aweee

Bucky awoke to Steve sleeping in a chair on the opposite side of the room. Steve was snoring softly. Sorry, Steve, he thought to himself as he stumbled out of the bed and opened the closet to put on a fresh pair of Steve's clothes. Steve stretched various ways before sitting up. He rubbed his eyes and stared at Bucky while blinking a few times to wake up. Suddenly his face was tinted with a blush.

“Oh my gosh, sorry. I didn’t mean to look while you were changing.”

“It’s fine. I know you didn’t mean to.”

“How about we never speak of this again?” Steve smiled.

“Deal.” Bucky said as he slipped on a shirt. He tossed Steve a blue shirt and a pair of jeans. 

“Well,” Steve disappeared into the bathroom and came out with a pair of socks. “I have an idea, but I know you might not like it.”

“Well, we can send someone out to get you some of your belongings today.”

“Who, like, Loki or something?”

“Oh, no. I was thinking more along the lines of Tony because of his social stance.”

Bucky sighed. Great. Frickin’ great. He’d lied about his previous life. He had no belongings to get, so how was he gonna explain to the guys that he’d been imprisoned and manipulated by Hydra for years.

“I don’t know if it’s gonna be worth it.” Bucky sat back down on the bed.“I have nothing to get.”

Steve looked up from tying his shoelaces. “Huh?”

“I uh, don’t really have anything to get.” Bucky shrugged. “After I fell I was taken by Hydra. Do you think it’s because I’m human? You said you recognized the vibranium of my arm and, uh, well, that’s where I got it.”

“Oh,” Steve shifted his weight and leaned against his dresser, “And you’re sure no agents followed you here?”

“You’re not saying -”

“No, no I trust you. I just don’t know how Loki would feel if he knew there was a possibility some Hydra agent was after one of his guests and an ‘attractive’ guest at that.” Steve explained. Loki thought he was attractive?

“You can’t tell Loki i spilled that. I shouldn’t have said that But Loki is talking to me about it and I guess I couldn’t help it.” He pushed away from the wall and sat down on the spot next to Buck. “Loki’s hot-headed. It’s one of his flaws, but he’s a really good guy. Sadly, you just haven’t seen that side of him yet.” Steve stood back up with a sigh. “You should go get some breakfast, and I’ll send Tony to go find you.”

“But I don’t need to get anything. Why are we still going out?”

“I never said we couldn’t buy you some clothes.”

Bucky took a deep breath. “I’ll pay you back as soon as I can, I swear.”

“Bucky,” Steve chuckled. “Do you even know how much money Tony has?”

“Well, If you say so-”

“And I do!” Steve said as he stood from the bed. “Come on, let’s eat. I’m sure you’re starving because it’s almost noon.” Bucky looked up at Steve in shock as he also rose from the bed. “I know, I accidentally let you sleep in, but that’s pretty usual around here.”

“Dick.” Bucky whispered. “You know, I miss this. Waking up with you.”

“Me too.” Then Steve was slipping through the door and walking down the hallway with his hands in his pockets and Bucky followed suit.

His needy attitude was stupid. Bucky was stupid.

Everything was stupid.

He had just turned a corner when a door was suddenly flying open, causing Buck to run into it and nearly fall backward in shock.His heart skipped a beat when he realized who had stepped out.

“Haven’t seen you in a hot second,” Clint grinned as he came closer. Bucky backed up. “I heard that we were getting a pet. How exciting!”

“You can’t hurt me,”Bucky said. “It’s not my fault I literally can’t leave.”

Clint laughed loudly. “That doesn’t concern me. All I know is that you’re here, so we are going to have some fun.”

Bucky couldn’t hear himself think.

“People here favor me Buckerino, don’t know if you knew that or not. I can mess you and make your life a living hell and no one would give a shit.” Clint said while slowly taking an arrow out of his quiver. fuck.

“For fuck's sake Barton,” Steve appeared in the doorway that Clint had come out of, and he looked very annoyed. He stared at Clinton. “Will you leave the guy alone?”

“He’s virtually useless to everyone here,” Clint argued. “Are you really going to defend him?”

“He doesn’t deserve to messed with by an ass like you,” 

“I was just joshin’ ya.” he muttered as he shoved past Steve and disappeared down the hallway.

“I’m sorry about that. Clint takes the joke a little too far sometimes.” he offered Bucky a plate. “You want some eggs?”

Bucky shrugged his shoulders. There was a table full of guests at one wall and a smaller table currently abandoned next to it. Tony waved from the more crowded table.  
He gestured to the chair that was resting against the wall.

“Take a seat!”

“ok. Right.” Bucky drug the chair over to the far end of the table and sat down next to Natasha and Bruce.

“So what if I leave my sunglasses on indoors.” Tony turned towards Bucky while finishing his conversation with ‘tash. “I swear I’m not a douchebag.”  
“He really is,” Thor argued.

“Ok Mr. I’m-a-God-and-you’re-not, prove to me how you’re not just a pretentious douche with a few carpenters tools.” Tony leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms, challenging Thor.

“If you insist.” The blonde God replied defensively. Thor picked up a hammer and started jogging into the hallway and outside.

“Tsk, tsk, always running away from his problems.”

“Here” was the first thing that Thor said as he jogged back into the room with a takeout box and several Asgardian beers.

Thor dropped the box in front of tony and took a drink of his ale.

“Thank you! “ Tony sais, barely audible with the way he was shoveling thor's gift of shawarma into his mouth.  
“Don’t mention it.” 

“ So uh, we should probably get going. We don’t even know what we are getting yet.” Bucky stood up from his chair and wiped his hands on his jeans.

“I’m not even done with my shawarma yet!” Tony shouted.

A fresh start was something Bucky could use.

Steve pat Tony’s back as he finished the last of his shawarma. “Alright. Go get some stuff now.  
”  
“Yeah, yeah alright I’m going.” Tony shrugged away from Steve’s hand.

“Let’s go then.” Bucky stated as he started down the hallway. Bucky shivered as Tony walked up to a heavily bolted door and unlocked it. The door opened to the outdoors, so Bucky assumed this was the door he had found when he had first arrived.

“We still have a while to walk to the garage,” Tony explained as he held open the door for Bucky. Bucky inspected the giant trees around them, the leaves were so thick that you could barely see the sky above.

After around six more minutes of walking with the occasional conversation and awkward silences, Tony stopped in front of a highly camouflaged building.

A worn down old garage covered in leaves and surrounded by trees and tall grass. Tony flicked out a small pocket knife and dug it into the lock on the rusty door handle, feeling around until the door budged open a bit. Tony shoved himself into the door and it groaned loudly as it opened.

“I take it you don’t go out much.” Bucky stated, referring to the state of the garage. Tony shook his head.

“Uh, no, we don’t. Loki says if we go out too often it would be a liability. You go first.”

Bucky stared at Tony for a few seconds before giving up and carefully taking a step into the dark garage. 

“Flip the light switch on. It should be to your right on the wall.”

Bucky felt for the light and flipped it on. The garage was filled with two cars and three more fancy looking cars.  
“Black Cadillac farthest down.”

Tony unlocked the car and slid into the driver’s seat, Bucky following on the passenger side. They traveled silence before the car was driving down a country road and taking a sharp turn onto the asphalt.

“Are there others like you guys? ” He really hoped Tony knew where he was going.

“No, I’m not sure, but I suppose there is always a possibility.” he said.

Bucky wrapped his arms around himself as Tony sped towards their destination. When they reached the city, Tony moved his way through traffic in the direction of the store. It had been a while since Bucky had been back here.

They approached a standard looking store, carefully parking the car. There was a sale today, which made Bucky feel tremendously better for using Tony’s money. Tony led the way into the store's automatic doors and grabbed a cart on their way inside. 

Tony led bucky through the isles and held up clothes to Bucky’s body.

Tony hummed while holding up a maroon shirt. “Okay, yes.” He said before throwing the item into the cart.

“Wha-no. I thought I was picking out my own clothes. How do you know if I even like that?” Bucky argued, gesturing to the cart.

“I’m not having you roam around our base looking like a depressed clown. You’ve been wearing the same combination of dark colors every day. We’re getting you less black.”

Tony had a point. The only time Bucky could recall dressing in anything brighter than grey was before the war. 

Walking into a men's section, Bucky found a green jacket with little army patches on it. It might be a little sappy but it reminded him of Steve.

Bucky acted fast, swiping the jacket and tossing it into the cart. Tony grabbed a baseball cap off the shelf and threw it into the cart. 

“I don’t wear hats though.” Bucky said as he noticed the cap in the cart.

“Well, You do now. Your hair is a greasy mess.” Tony shoved him into the next aisle. 

“Tony -”

“Get the rest of your stuff Buck... We have to leave soon.” Bucky obeyed and grabbed the last of the things he thought he needed as Tony walked towards the 

There were a couple minutes of silence before Tony interrupted again.

“Alright Buck, got everything you need?” Tony asked before he set several food items into the cart.

“Oh my god,” Bucky gasped. “I can’t remember the last time I had Oreos!”

“Well, Think of it as my welcoming gift.” Tony grinned as he pushed the cart toward the checkout area.

“The Oreos or all of this?. I could never have gotten this far if it wasn’t for you, so thank you.”

Silence. No one said a word as Tony scanned the Items. He inserted his credit card and paid the fee. 

“Where now?”

“We’re going to get you something to do because I can’t promise you’ll always be busy.” Tony retorted, grabbing the bags and walking out of the store. 

“What?” Bucky asked dumbfoundedly. 

“Buck, please just let me get you this one last thing. I know you feel bad but really it’s no trouble at all.” 

“Ok. Fine. Thanks, But it has to be cheap okay?” Tony didn’t answer.

Bucky wondered what he was gonna get, but It wasn’t too hard to guess as they pulled into the parking lot of a nearby music store.

“I thought you might like something gentle.” Tony stated as he picked up a light wood toned ukulele. 

“Why a ukulele?” Bucky asked, surprised that Tony thought he could be anything but a brute with his metal arm. 

“Uh, I thought you might like something delicate. I might make you feel like less of a monster with that big old hunk of metal.” Tony scratched his head. “Anyways, I have to get a   
new guitar pick for Wanda.”

“This one is nice,” Bucky suggested, picking out a maroon pick for Wanda.

“Yeah,” Tony said with a shrug. “Let’s get outta here.”

“Ok, ok. Thank you so much, by the way.” Bucky said as he held his first instrument.

Something that might make him feel a little less trapped.


	6. Can We Not Please?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING!  
> Sad Loki hours boys. New info and Clint is back!!!

Bucky sat in his room strumming a sour note on his ukulele, humming happily.

Tony had helped him learn two chords, but the more Bucky played them, the more he realized Tony had no clue how to play either. Wanda had revealed that her room was right next door to Bucky’s. She loved the new pick that they had gotten her. She has suggested that she could teach Bucky a lot more about music than Tony could. He believed her.  
After Bucky carefully put his ukulele away, he had taken an hour long shower, letting himself relax under the warm water. 

He brushed his teeth for the first time in a while with the toothbrush Tony got him. He stood in front of the mirror debating whether or not to shave the stubble growing back, but eventually decided against it. Bucky could now finally wear his own clothing instead of stealing Steve’s. He wore a plain grey shirt and jeans with the new green army jacket he got. Steve might like that. He placed the hat Tony got him on his head, even though it looked a little funky at first, and he finally felt like he could own things for himself. Things were going to be ok.

There was a loud knock on his door, wiping his hands on his jeans, Bucky got up to answer. They kept knocking over and over, pretty loudly too.  
“Yeah, jeez. Hold on,” he mumbled as he swung open the door.

It was Thor.

“James!” Thor greeted, “My brother Loki has spoken to me, and he would like to see you.”

Oh. Loki.

“Uh, alright. When?” Bucky nodded.

“Now.” Thor explained, grabbing Bucky's wrist and dragging him out of his room.

“Are you coming with me?”

“Goodness, no. He asked for you alone.”

Alone.

Thor continued to drag him towards Loki’s chambers. When they reached the door of the room, Bucky had to make sure he was really doing this. He then unlocked the door and pulled it wide open.

Loki’s feet were hanging off the end of his bed, his hands draped over his chest. He raised his head when Bucky entered. Bucky noticed how different things about Loki looked, like the fact that his hair was a mess, and his eyes were red and puffy. He noticed the radio in the corner was playing some jazz, gentle music filling the room. Loki shifted his position so he was laying on his stomach facing Bucky. 

“Hey, Buck. We have to talk.” Bucky slid into a comfy looking chair facing Loki’s bed. He attempted to suppress his nervousness.

“What are we talking about?” Bucky questioned. 

Loki rubbed the bridge of his nose. “We’ve talked before when I wasn’t sober, and I’ve been told that I freaked out on you.”

“Well, it was really more of a one-sided conversation.”

Loki shook his head. “I hope I didn’t do anything too bad to you. I just wanted to apologize.”

Bucky ran a hand through his hair. He was still getting used to having it short. “I don’t think you completely understand. I’m over it, really. I was just a little surprised by it at the time.”

“Good then, I was hoping you wouldn’t hate me.” He seemed to be somewhere else. “Just one more question,” Loki moved his shoulders around before continuing, “Do you swing that way?”

Bucky stared at him in confusion. “What?”

Loki laughed loudly. “Come on Buck, we all have attractive people we keep our eyes on. I can’t be the only one who is uh, interested.” His eyes flickered across the room before his voice trailed off.“I am just wondering because you seem awfully tense around Steve. I’m sure he wants to bang you or something.

Bucky could feel his face heating up. “I don’t want to talk about that.”

Loki held up his hands in defense. “Alright, that’s alright.” They stood in silence.

Bucky was becoming a little uncomfortable with how long nothing was being said between the two. “Uh, can I-”

“Oh, yeah, you can leave,” Loki said, waving his hand and taking his eyes away from Bucky.

Bucky let out a breath. “Why hasn't anyone tried to kill me yet?” Loki ignored the question and asked his own instead.

“Why would we want to kill you? You’re my play toy. Why would I get rid of someone so...”

“Listen, I’m not interested alright! I’m still figuring out my stance with Steve.”

Loki stood up from the desk and moved closer to Bucky. He reached into his drawer next to his bed and pulled out a small knife. 

Fear flashed across Bucky’s face. “Please.”

“You know, nothing you say means anything to me. You’re worthless compared to me. I am a God. If you are staying here you will do as I say. I say dance, and you dance.” When Bucky tried to move out of the room he flicked the knife open. Loki pushed the point against the crook of his own elbow. “Don’t leave me.”

“I’m not, I’m not ready. For any of this. Maybe someday I will be but-.”

“Fine! Leave!” Loki screamed, his anger bubbling out. “You’re the one ruining everything here!” Loki threw the knife onto the concrete floor of his room. “The human race is a mess. I can’t believe we’ve kept a conversation for this long.” 

He stared at Bucky, frozen. Bucky left the room in seconds. Loki was crying.

But he was okay.

-

Bucky went back to his room thinking of Loki sprawled out on the floor, crying.

When he was asked about it, Bucky dismissed nearly everyone’s questions.

“Please tell me what happened.” Steve had asked.

“Loki wanted to talk to me,” Bucky started.“we talked, but then he got so mad and I was scared something bad was going to happen. He said some nasty things and then he started hurting himself, and -” Bucky choked.

“He hurt himself?” Steve asked quietly. He looked pretty upset.

“Uh huh. I thought he was going to hurt me, but he said he wouldn’t kill something...” Bucky trailed off. “I think he’s into me. And it’s kind of freaking me out. "

“Well, are you interested in-.”

“No! He’s possessive and unstable. I won’t deny that he is attractive but still!”

“I think you’re into him.” Steve finished. He smiled like he wasn’t surprised. “Bucky, I know you still think you love me, but I’ve changed. I still love you, I really do. But, The old Steve is gone. I’m sorry. I don’t want to get back together with you.”

Bucky blinked. “Oh, that’s alright. I get it.”

“I think this could be a good option for you,” Steve said. “He’s a little unstable, sure. I think you’d be good for him, though. He likes you. Just give it a try, for now...”

“I don’t think I’m ready.” Bucky said blatantly. 

Steve chuckled softly. “Yeah, you always were hard-to-get.”

Bucky smiled before turning to leave. He was an idiot.

“You don’t know anything about me.”

“I know even though you deny it, you think Loki’s hot.” Steve said with a smug grin. 

“Okay,” Bucky pointed a finger and took one long stride back over to him. “Fine. You want me to admit it? Alright. Yes, Steve, Loki is a very attractive person. But he has a shit personality.”

Steve cheered. “I knew it! I knew it.” 

Bucky didn’t say anything, just scowled and left the room. 

-

Bucky had been wandering the hallways for about an hour, just thinking.

Probably.

“Hey!”

There was a girl’s voice. He turned around to see Wanda bounding his way. She smiled.

“Hello.”

"Hey, Wanda." Bucky wondered if it would be weird to ask her to take him to the dining room.

“What were you guys talking about?” Wanda said as she pointed at Josh. 

“Oh! Nothing too important.” Bucky lied. “I’m actually pretty hungry. Could we grab some food?” 

“Alright, I’ll respect your privacy. Let’s go then.” Wanda replied. Bucky shoved his hands in his pockets.

“I think I’ll have toast today. Maybe some eggs.”

Wanda giggled. “Yeah, that’s really all we eat, but you’ll get used to it.”

Wanda led Bucky out of the hallway and into the dining room. The dining room was bustling with activity when they arrived, which was strange because it wasn’t even mealtime. 

“If you ever need me, you know where I’ll be!” the brunet pulled Bucky into a hug before skipping away. Bucky decided that he very much liked Wanda.

Bucky was navigating through tables and chairs to Natasha, Thor, and Bruce. He pulled up a chair next to the group of men sitting around the table.  
“Hey, Bucky! How’d it go?” Bruce leaned over and patted his arm.

“Eh.” Bruce seemed to notice Bucky was staring at his plate of food. 

“I take it my brother was being his usual self again. I don’t know why he doesn't understand that acting out like this is only going to make him more of a disappointment to Father.” Thor said casually.

“Hey. Let’s get you a snack.” said Bruce hastily, trying to avoid a fight.

“It’s not like he’s trying to...” Bucky added quietly. Thor looked at him.

“Why are you defending him? I thought you were terrified of him.” Thor’s face twisted in confusion.

“I don’t,” he argued, “he just needs someone to talk to him. Maybe if you listened to him instead of talking about him like he’s-”

“That does not give him the excuse to attack and murder!” Thor retorted as he crossed his arms. 

“Maybe he’s scared!”

“Bucky, let’s go get that food.” Bruce warned in a low tone. Bucky kept talking.

“Of course my brother is scared. If father was still here Loki would be locked away. That’s probably what would be best for him.” Thor said, calming down.  
Bucky stood up from the table and prepared to leave.

“He hurt himself, Thor.” Bucky sighed.

Thor looked shocked beyond belief. He seemed to be becoming self-conscious. “I’m...Sorry. I am going to, I’m going to talk to Loki.”

“It’s alright.” Bucky said before biding Thor farewell as he left for his brother.  
When Bucky sat back down, Nat was grinning crazily at him.

Bucky eyed him up and down. “What?”

Natasha leaned over across the table and sorta half-whispered, “You really want to bang Loki, huh?”

Bucky choked on air as crimson spread across his face. What a convenient time for Tony to be eavesdropping from the kitchen.

“Oh my God!” Tony yelled from his place near the large fridge. Bucky was mortified. 

Tony practically bolted into the room with a smirk spread across his face. He leaned over the table way too close to Bucky’s personal space. “You totally do!”

“No”. Bucky interrupted. His hand went to his head, resting his elbow on the table. “No way I, a grown man, am being teased like a young school girl.”

“That’s because it’s totally a school girl crush!.” Tony elaborated. 

“Clint probably spread the news to everyone by now.” Bruce grumbled. “That guy’s always causing problems.”

“He doesn’t like me much” Bucky added.

“Don’t worry about it. He went through some stuff with Loki.” Tony sat and kicked his feet up onto the table. 

“That fucking idiot.” Nat chuckled under her breath.”I’m sparring against him in five minutes. We agreed to meet here, but he probably forgot. I’d better go find him. Bye guys!”  
Natasha said as she pushed her chair, metal squeaking against the tile, politely back into its place.

“This is how most conversations end here.” Bruce said, rolling his eyes. He pushed out from the table and dusted his hands on his jeans. 

“We’ll chat again, yeah?” Bruce asked as he put on the cardigan laying on the back of his chair. Bucky shook his head and attempted a smile.

“Yeah. See you later, Bruce.” He was gone one smile later.

Bucky decided now would be a good time to get something to snack on.

Tony was still staring intently across the table.

“Uh, Do you have anything to drink?”

“He hurt himself pretty bad.” Tony began, staring into space. “I’m not sure if that’s the first time he’s done that, but it was messy.” Tony sighed sadly. He pulled his glasses off his face and began to clean them with the sleeve of his sweater. 

“We shouldn’t worry ourselves too much. Loki isn’t going to die anytime soon.” Tony continued. He placed his glasses back on his face before standing to go offer Bucky a beverage.

“Are you saying he’s immortal?” asked Bucky, following him into the kitchen.

“Not really. But, the guy’s a God, so I wouldn’t be surprised.” Tony started pouring Bucky a glass of orange juice. 

“I’m gonna go back to my room.” Bucky smiled and took the cup from Tony. This crush was ridiculous. Loki was one guy.

Except he was a literal God.

Bucky shuffled down the corridor.

If this was a crush, it would fade away on its own. Simple. Kind of.

No. Definitely not.

Bucky was fantasizing about playing his ukulele. He’ll lock himself up in his room and spend some time just for him. That was a good plan.He can take his mind off Loki. He had just barely opened his bedroom door when a hand flew to his mouth. It was dark.

“Shh.”

Fucking fuck

A million things raced through Bucky’s head in those moments. The lights were flicked on and the room lit up. Clint Barton himself was standing inches away from him. Clint pulled his hand away, and Bucky could feel him place it on his chest. What the hell was going on here?

And then Clint was kissing him.

Bucky clenched his eyes shut. He couldn’t believe this was happening. 

Clint hated Bucky.

Clint couldn’t stand him.

Except he slipped his hand down to the hem of Bucky’s shirt. He didn’t know what was going on, and this is when he pushed away.

“What was that for?” Bucky cleared his throat.

“We’ll do that again maybe, yeah?”

Then Clint disappeared out the door, leaving Bucky in disbelief.


	7. Nightmares and Oh God

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things happen. Then scary things happen. Then some more stuff happens.

Bucky laid in bed, staring at the blank white ceiling above him. He was thinking about the kiss earlier. Stupid Clint and his strong arms and bright blue eyes. It was over before it started, the kiss between Clint and him. He rolled over with a sigh. 

“We’ll do that again maybe, yeah?”

That was possibly the second most terrifying thing he had ever experienced. Staring into his eyes as he suddenly, forcefully too, kissed Bucky.  
He was going to have to talk to Clint about it. He hadn’t wanted to kiss him. They hated each other. 

He wanted to make up not make out.

Bucky left for the dining room, his eyes scanning the halls to see if he could find some trace of Clint. 

“Buck!” Steve smiled when he reached Bucky and rested a hand on his shoulder. Bucky placed a hand on his head and squeezed his eyes shut.

He chuckled. “Tired? Come on, it’s nearly time for dinner.” 

He was praying no one had found out about his and Bartons kiss, or he would be screwed. They would never let him hear the end of it. He didn’t even like it.   
Steve and Bucky approached the door to the entrance to the dining room. “Who makes the food?” Bucky asked once they had sat down. Somebody had to be doing it, right?

“We take turns,” replied Steve. “There is a schedule for each month. Clint Barton usually takes charge, though. He loves to cook.”

“How was your evening?” Bucky said, trying to take the conversation down a different road.

“Good, how was yours?”

“Oh, uhm,” a hundred different curse words ran through his thoughts. “It was alright. Normal stuff.”

Steve could tell Josh was lying. Of course, he could.

“Yeah,” he nodded. “Alright.”

Clint was in the kitchen slamming the knife against the cutting board. Oh hell, They’re gonna find out.

“Little Buck got freak-ayy!” Steve, Tony, and Natasha, who were talking in the doorway, turned to Clint in the kitchen area.

“Clint, you need to stop spreading rumors.” Tony said, sliding into the chair next to Bucky while Nat sat by Steve. 

Clint’s face filled with mock hurt. “How could you? Clint Barton does not spread rumors, especially not taboo related rumors.”

Tony snorted. “Of course. A leader should never make assumptions. I’m truly sorry.” Tony waved his hands around wildly.

Clint sighed. “Yeah, I don’t think so. You see, you are not the boss. The depressed hunk who’s banging Bucky is.”

“I am not having sex with him! We didn’t do anything!” Bucky blurted out. 

Clint scoffed. “I don’t know why you think I’m stupid.”

He hated this guy.

Nat grunted. “Clint, stop embarrassing him. So what if he had sex?”

“We didn’t!” Bucky was becoming hysterical. “Clint kissed me and that was the climax of the day! That’s it!”

“Woah, you actually kissed him?” Steve’s face was full of amazement. Bucky really wished he wasn’t alive.

“I didn’t like it. It’s never going to happen again.”

“But you want it too.” Clint sang quietly. 

“Alright.” Tony declared. He pointed down the hallway.

Clint shrugged and held out his hands. “Alright, I’m going. Good luck trying to bang the boss, Bucky.” Clint patted Bucky on the back roughly and left down the hallway.

“I’m sorry if he embarrassed you Bucky. He’s been acting weird lately.”

“Whatever,” Bucky mumbled.

“Have you guys talked about it yet?” Steve asked.

“I don’t want to talk about this.”

“Bucky-”

“Please stop.”

“Alright Steve, let’s just let him be.” Tony pulled on Steve’s arm a little. 

“I’m going to go to bed.” Bucky announced as he stood from his chair. 

“Wait!” Natasha darted into the kitchen and rustled around a bit before coming out and placing a paper plate in Buck’s hands. Nuts, cheese and crackers, grapes, and milk. Bucky grabbed the plate and mumbled a polite ‘thank you’ before he left the table. When he got back to his room, Bucky took a long, hot shower. 

He felt dirty.

\---

He had just barely finished dressing for the day when there was a loud beeping noise in his room. He could hear Loki’s voice. It must be a speaker system.

“James? Can you hear me?”

“I can hear you,” Bucky muttered.

“Good, it works. I would like to speak with you privately.”

“I’m not so sure about that.”

“That wasn’t so much a suggestion, it was a command.” Bucky was still looking for words when the speaker clicked off. He sighed and slipped on his shoes.  
Loki was pacing his quarters when Bucky pushed open the doors. The record player was playing something with cellos today.  
He was wearing a black T-shirt and black dress pants, your stereotypical emo teen...

“Hey.” Bucky murmured as he made his way over to Loki. He prepared to sit down, but Loki grabbed Josh’s arm and twisted it behind his back, pulling him close until there were only a few inches between them. 

“We need to talk.”

“This is kind of an uncomfortable way to talk.”

Loki raised an eyebrow, but then realized and let Bucky go.

“You seem upset. What is wrong?”

“One minute Clint’s acting like he hates me and now he-”

“He kissed you.”

Bucky’s jaw clenched. “Everyones knows by now. They don’t have to deal with the shit I do. I didn’t even like it! And they won’t let it go!”

“Nobody has it easy.”

“Yeah, no one in here does either. You know, they worry about you.”

“Uhm, yes. We need to talk about what I called you for.”

“When I first saw you, I thought you’d be dead in minutes. But then you weren’t.” Bucky didn’t dare breathe. “I was in control of Mr. Barton.” Loki sighed.

Bucky stared at Loki in shock. He walked out without looking at Loki.

He jogged up to his room and slammed the door. Then he was turning around and punching the wall as hard as he possibly could. A stray tear dripped down his face. Bucky’s door clicked open in the midst of his thoughts. He held his breath. He wasn’t to surprised when someone came into the room. He refused to make eye contact.

“Uh, I thought I heard something. I came in here to check. Are you alright, James?” It was Wanda.

“I punched the wall,” Bucky muttered. 

“You punched a wall? Why did you do that?”

He was an idiot.

Finally, He made eye contact with Wanda. He was silent as he wrapped his arms around her and embraced her.  
“I got upset.”

“Okay, just tell me what I can do to help.”

“You can’t do anything for me.”

“I heard you talked to Loki today.”

“Fuck Loki.”

“Alright.”

Bucky rubbed his eyes. “I’m sorry for yelling.” Wanda nodded.

Bucky decided he was going to take a nap.

\---

He found himself dashing quickly through the forest. The trees around the strange building didn’t help Bucky figure out where he was. Everything looked the same. He tripped on an uprooted tree trunk, rocks embedding themselves into his bare arms as he fell. Bucky looked up to see the outstretched hand of someone trying to help him up.

Loki. Wearing a referee outfit?

Bucky gratefully took his hand and sprang up to his feet. But now he wasn’t in a forest. He was in an arena, and Loki was still holding his hand.

“The Winter Soldier!” Loki yelled as the audience cheered. Bucky couldn’t speak.

He yanked his arm away from Loki and stumbled backward, falling once he walked into something behind him. He felt the mud in between his fingers as he sat up. Blood, not mud. His head whipped around. He had fallen on a heap of his friends. Thor, Wanda, Bruce, Nat, Tony, and even Clint.

“Wha-?” Bucky tried not to let out a wail.

“Let’s hear it for our champion once more!” Bucky took a step back as Loki spoke to the audience. “Place your bets now folks, the fun’s just getting started.”

“Why is this happening to me?!” Bucky asked, his voice raw. 

“It’s Saturday night, baby!”

“Stop this.” Bucky begged.

“It’s kill or be killed here.” Loki whispered. Then Loki reached out and grasped Bucky’s wrist again.”Let’s see how our next opponent fairs!” Bucky looked across the arena.

Steve.

Bucky watched himself slaughter Steve. He saw himself strangle him. He felt Steve’s bones crack under his skin, his body full of bruises. He whipped out that gad damn knife and pressed it against Steve’s throat. He had no control of his body. Steve wasn’t fighting back. Why wasn’t he fighting back?!  
One long, sharp cut opened Steve’s throat for the crowd to see. He dragged Steve’s lifeless corpse to the pile of rotting friends. They turned into ash as Bucky saw himself smile.  
Bucky shot up from his bed. He was covered in sweat and rubbed his eyes to adjust to the darkness of his room. Bucky ran his fingers through his hair. It had only been a dream. 

There was a knock on his door.

He held his breath and shuffled under his covers. The person knocked again. He figured they would go away if he just didn’t answer. The person didn’t stop. Bucky grumbled under his breath as he climbed out of bed opened the door. Loki stood wringing his hands with that stupid smirk on his face. Bucky blinked. He didn’t know what to say. What should he say? 

Loki gestured to Bucky’s room. “Would you mind if I come in?”

Yeah, I care, Bucky thought.   
He pulled the door open farther so Loki could come in anyways. Loki looked around the room before his eyes found Bucky.

He sighed. “I was just- I was walking around and I heard a scream.” 

“Just walking around?”

“Well, making breakfast and-”

“Mm-hmm.” 

“I know you don’t believe me. I’m trying to make things better around here, and not just for you.” What did he mean? Bucky sighed quietly and thought about the situation, still slightly confused. Loki was genuinely trying to make things right. Maybe he can change for the better.

A small smile arose on Bucky’s face. “Yeah?”

“Maybe we’ll have to work together. I’m asking for your help because I can’t keep trying to pretend I’m able to do everything by myself.”

“Together.”

Loki leads Bucky out of his room to the kitchen to resume preparing breakfast for the group. He looked up at Loki with a small smile on his face as he helped make pancake batter. After the third try, Loki had correctly made the perfect batch. Bucky was quick to lightly hug Loki without really thinking about it. Loki didn't seem phased by it and laughed instead.

“You did it!” Bucky cheered. 

“That’s because you did most of the work. I don’t want to hear your smart ass comments.”

Bucky laughed. “You’re just jealous because I’m a better cook than you.” He grabbed a pancake off the plate and took a bite.

Today was already off to a great start.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed! Leave me comments so I can improve. More to come, babes!


End file.
